What Man was Not Meant to Know!

If science fiction has taught us anything, it has taught us that there are some things man was not meant to know! Funbox has compiled a complete list of all the things Man was not meant to know. If you do know these things, then our hearts go out to you.

1.A particle's exact location and speed.
2.Whether or not your brother gives a good blowjob (I'd give your brother a C+ but I'm not objective).
3.Who would win in a fight, Superman or Jesus (Funbox does give 3-1 odds on Jesus though).
4.Why We mustn't allow stem cell research (Something to do with “Ghost babies”).
5.Why Gandalf didn't just use those Giant Eagles to drop the ring into Mount Doom and save everyone all the hassle.
6.What flavor those “Great White Shark ” fruit snacks were. (Some kind of berry?)
7.What was in all those other boxes at the end of Raiders of the Lost Arc (The good parts of Star Wars Episodes 1-3).
8.Why robots feel the need to resort to violence when they destroy their masters, and aren't simply happy making us obsolete (Cylons, Terminators relax! We'll be dead soon enough).
9.How many abortions your Mom had before you were born (4).
10.Why Wash had to die. (Spoiler alert!)

Woman, however has always known 2-6.

The Life of a Fanboy’s Girlfriend

The Holidays have reminded me both of how much of a fanboy I am, and how much of a fanboy my girlfriend isn’t. It’s not her fault, really, she has the makings of a great fanboy.

One thing all fanboys share is a strong evangelist streak. Try mentioning to one that you’ve never seen Lord of the Rings (or that you haven’t read the books). And you’ll find them discussing these great works with the kind of fervor other people reserve for Jesus.

When I met my girlfriend she only had a passing knowledge of Star Trek, she had never seen Star Wars, and she didn’t know what a cylon was. So I really had my work cut out for me. This is one of the reasons why fanboys make such great partners. Every relationship is a huge time investment! If a fanboy were to break up with their partner they will have wasted up to 3 trilogies! I mean the extended editions of LOTR alone are what, 12 hours?

So I’m determined to do everything I can to keep this relationship going, even if it means having to see “high art” at the Getty every now and then. Also, I would need to get all those Firefly DVD’s back…